


There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin.

by skyblue993



Category: The Fosters (TV 2013), The Fosters (TV 2013) RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Blackmail, Cruel intentions vibes, Deceit, Jonnor - Freeform, Jude's POV, M/M, Taylor is a bitch, Virgin!Connor, schemes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-10
Updated: 2016-12-15
Packaged: 2018-06-06 14:38:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6758107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skyblue993/pseuds/skyblue993
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Connor Stevens is saving his virginity till marriage and Jude Jacob is aiming to take that away from him.<br/>Two different words collide and nothing will be ever be the same for the both of them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is an OOC fic, so the characters will be not the same we're used to :) Let me know what you think of this!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor Stevens is saving his virginity till marriage and Jude Jacob is aiming to take that away from him.  
> Two different words collide and nothing will be ever be the same for the both of them.

 

She looks at me, with those deceitful eyes, lips lifting up in a mischievous smirk as she pushes me against a secluded wall, just outside the gym. She makes me moan, licking my neck as droplets of sweat are running down my collarbone.

“Jesus fuck, Taylor.”

“You've been such a good boy, Jude..” She smirks, hiding her face into the crook of my neck. She knows how to push the right buttons and in particular, she knows how to leave me with blueballs.

“So.. this is a reward?” My dick is painfully throbbing inside of my pants, begging for attention. She just likes to tease me, as usual,but this time I can't just pretend I'm not suffering, because I am. It's been two fucking years and this game is officially pissing me off.

“Fuck.” She pulls away, smiling innocently before kissing me on my cheek.

“That's all I get? Seriously?”

She shakes her head in fake disappointment “Ah.. Jude.. Better things come to those who wait.”

“It's been two fucking years, Ty. You've been with other guys before me.” I'm aware that my tone is whiny and she's probably thinking that I'm an asshole.. but seriously people.. I need a fucking release, besides, Taylor is known for sleeping with other guys, she's a master in teasing people till they lose their fucking mind.

“What the fuck are you implying about me?” Her slightly pissed voice makes me flinch involuntary. She glares at me with those sexy, mischievous eyes as she impatiently taps her foot on the floor.

“N-nothing.. it's just.”  
“You don't love me.” She sighs with a pout on her lips, shaking her head in disappointment as she takes few steps backwards. I take few steps forward reaching out to her, caressing her arms. “Of course I love you..”

I wouldn't call it love, If I have to be completely honest with myself. It's just.. this thing between us, this 'chasing game' has become an addiction to me. I'm completely hooked to her and the way she makes me feel and how her voice is as powerful as a mermaid chant. When it comes to her, every cells of my brain burn down completely.

“Prove it to me.” She whispers as she lifts her hand, touching my face.  
“How?” She smiles, biting her lips as she holds my hand leading me outside.

“Where the fuck are we going now?”  
“Just keep walking.” She groans, leading the way towards the school field. We're standing under the bleachers looking at the football time warming up.

“What the fuck are we doing here?”  
“Just look.” She says pointing her finger towards one particular boy, stretching and panting as he runs on the field.

I know him. I can't help but let out an amused laugh. “Virgin Stevens.”

She nods, biting her lips. “I want you to seduce him.” Her voice seems so amused and confident about the fact that I will just do that, just because she tells me so.  
  
“Okay, Tay.. not funny.” She leans closer to me, whispering softly in my ear. “I'm not joking around, Jude.”

My eyes widen as a strangled laugh escapes my lips. “W-”

She smiles mischievously, amused by the shock on my face. “ You have two weeks. If you love me, you're gonna seduce him... and then, I'll be all yours. I promise.”

“Have you fucking lost your mind?!” My voice comes out incredulous and with a slight edge of Panic. She's completely messed up in the head, that is.

“Shh!” She put her finger on my lips, shutting me up. “I know you're attracted to boys too.” Before my eyes can get even more dilated she adds. “Don't even deny it.. I've seen the way you look at Jamie, from the football team every time he walks past our table in the cafeteria.” She draws circles on my chest, lowering down her gaze focusing on the movements of her fingers on the soft pattern of my shirt.  
I swallow down some saliva, feeling my pulse speeding up as my throat is getting dry. “It's okay.. Jude. You're in the closet and since your parents don't know..”  
“They can't know.” I rush to say and She flinches at the sharp edge in my voice. She nods then, lifting up her gaze, looking at me in the eyes before telling me again “Seduce him.. and I'll make sure that no one ever knows about this. ”  
“Is this a threat?” Her lips part in fake outrage, looking at me with the same deceitful spark in her eyes. “ I wouldn't call it a threat. We're both gonna earn some benefits out of it.”

I'm officially feeling my stomach twisting, feeling like I'm gonna throw up. This little bitch. She leans in, whispering in my ear. “You have two weeks.”

“H-he's saving his fucking virginity for marriage!”  
She laughs. “That's what makes it interesting.”

“I won't do this.”

She nods in resignment, letting out a deep sigh. “You leave me no choice, Jude.”  
“What?”

She smiles sadly, as she holds her phone into her hands, scrolling through the pictures.

“Oh my God.”

“Yup.” She replies, her eyes now sparkling with satisfaction. “This is a video of you and Jamie shamelessy making out at Daria's birthday party.”  
  
“We were fucking drunk!”  
She keeps looking at me with a innocent expression flashing across her features. “That's what you're gonna tell your parents when I'll show them this video? You better come up with something better to say, Jude.”

I feel like I'm gonna throw up, I hate her... fuck, I can't believe this. I can't breathe.  
I close my eyes, exhaling sharply as she keeps standing across from me with phone in her hand and a eyebrow raised in expectation. I open my eyes, looking at her in pathetic desperation. She's like the puppet master and I'm tied to her strings.

I have no choice, I mean I have one... I can always refuse and come out to my parents. I let out a humorless laugh at the irony of my own thoughts. Yeah sure. Coming out to Mr. Jacob, virtuous man with an honourable lineage and her bigot, full of prejudice, trophy wife “slash” step mom “Slash” Biggest whore in San Diego. Not a good idea.  
My eyes lock with Taylor's and it takes one last pleading look to make her smile pridefully, smirking victioriously as she looks at her shameful puppet, staring at the football field, studying his expiatory victim.

“Connor Stevens, the virgin boy.”

 

 


	2. Chapter 2.

 

 

It's been two days of watching, observing, gathering all the informations I need to make Connor Stevens fall at my feet.

He's called “The virgin boy” among the student body because of his capability of keeping his ass off limits to anyone. It's fascinating, if you think about it.. He's seventeen and firm about keeping his virginity intact till marriage. He's not ugly, at the contrary, he's smoking hot ; He has these sandy hair blowing in the wind as he runs on the soccer field whose sight makes me wonder if they are really soft as they looks. My mind starts creating images of my hand gripping at his hair as we kiss and he moans in pleasure.. begging for more. It will probably never happen, not now or in a thousand years. There's no way I will achieve my goal...I know, positivity is my second name.

My gaze falls on his muscled legs and his sunkissed skin ;I wonder how it would feel the contrast between my pasty skin and his tunned body, The thought makes me shiver in delight but the realization that none of that will ever happen makes me sigh in defeat.

One persistent thought is crossing my mind and it keeps bothering me for two days. How is that even possible that a boy like him has never experienced the pleasure that comes with..the release? I mean.. the boy is built like a Greek God.. It makes me wonder if he'd ever felt the need to be touched or craved the fulfilling sensation of a dick in his ass. Millions of questions flow through my mind a mile a minute; Has he ever touched himself? Is He even aware that he's provided with a cock? Has he ever had his first kiss? Those plump lips seems to be begging to be kissed among with something else.

Okay, stop Jude Jacob. Focus.

Look at those arms, so strong and muscled. Oh fuck.. I'm a mess. The more I watch him, the more I don't understand how a guy like him is suppose to keep his virginity locked in a golden cage until marriage. I can't fucking understand.. my mind is filled with thoughts and images of him.. and I suddenly can't function anymore, I feel like my head is going to explode in three.. two.. one..

“Fuck!”

  
“Calm down, cowboy.” Taylor's voice makes me flinch in surprise. I turn around and she's looking at me with an amused smirk on her lips. “Too soon.. you have to give him some time..” She laughs. The evil bitch.

“Why would you do this to him.” If I have to do this, I need to know why.

She shrugs. “Connor Stevens and I go way back.”

  
My eyes widen in surprise as a soft gasp escape out my lips. For some strange reasons I suddenly feel a sickening feeling creeping right through me at the incoming thought flowing through my mind.

“Did you two-”

  
“Ew, No.” She frowns, pulling out a pocket mirrorw as she applies a cherry gloss on her lips

. “He came out when he was thirteen.” Wow. Such a young age..

“Then what the hell has he done to you?”

She closes her mirror looking at me with her cherry lips and a stern look in my direction “It's between me and Connor Stevens.” She takes two steps forward, dangerously leaning in as she whispers with feeble voice. “You don't need to know.. you just need to follow the instructions.” Her hand trails down, grabbing mine. “If you want this.” 

“Oh my fucking-”  
“Do you.. still want it, right?” her cherry lips brushes over the shell of my ear as my voice comes out shaky and uncertain. I close my eyes feeling the twisting pain in my stomach coming back, making me feel all dizzy.“Yeah.”  
I know I'm a pussy. I know.. okay?I'm her puppet and I wish I had the strenght to oppose myself to her because Letting a girl treating me like that it's not the manly thing to do.. but I can't help it, when I'm with her my brain cells burn down completely until I feel my lungs deprived of air. I wish I had a way out but I feel like stuck in a dead end because She's gonna expose me to my parents and they can't never know.  _Never._

“Good.” She pulls away looking with satisfaction at the walking mess she has created With a smile on her lips indicating that she considers herself a winner.

“I gotta go.” She smiles kissing me on my cheek. “Oh, the boys are going to shower now.. you should wait outside the gym so you can work on your target.” She suggests with a fake innocent smile on her lips before heading towards the entry of the school.

I close my eyes shut, inhaling and exhaling through my nose as I walk towards the entry of the gym. There are voices coming through the backyard as I walk past the front door. It sounds like laughter and.. moans? I furrow my eyebrows as a confused sighs comes out of my lips. I turn the corner hearing that I'm getting closer to the voices.

“What are you going to do now?” A voice that I recognize as Cody, one of the best soccer players in our team, screams against someone. As soon as I walk towards them I realize that Cody is pinning Connor against the wall as the rest of them is laughing, enjoing the scene. No one has noticed me yet. I feel anxiety running through my body as Cody pushes Connor against the wall, I hear myself flinching when he closes his eyes, letting out a distressed moan. I feel a cold shiver running down my spine, realizing that just assisting the scene made me experience the same sharp pain running through Connor's body.

“P-Please.. stop.” His voice comes out desperate as he tries to push Cody Away.

“What are you going to do huh? Hitting me with holy water?”

I roll my eyes, letting out a slight snort. So pathetic. Apparently it wasn't that much slight.. Because They all turn around, acwknoledging my presence as they glare at me, with threatening expression across their faces. Jamie is the only one that's not looking at me like he's going to eat me alive. His eyes are kindly suggesting me to get the hell away from there if I care about my legs. Cody stops his fist mid-air, turning his face towards me. “What the hell are you looking at, Jacob?”

Connor looks at me with resignment in his eyes before lowering down his gaze as he's still being pinned by Cody. At this point I have two options: get the hell away from there and save my face and my legs or... for once in my life, man up, grow some balls and do the right thing.

“I didn't know you were into these kind of things, Cody.” My eyes widen at my own words, oh fuck.. what the hell did I just said?! _Man up._ Remember, Jude Jacob.

“What the fuck did you just say?!” He lets Connor go, rushing towards me as my whole life starts flashing before my eyes.. I Have my speech ready in occasions like this one. 'I'm gonna miss-' Um well.. I don't know what I'm going to miss to be honest.. my parents, yeah... let's forget about that. Callie.. oh Callie, I miss her so much.. thinking about her causes my eyes to tear up and I sadly realize that it's not the right moment to get carried away with memories, since I'm about to be brutally beaten up. I give a loud sigh looking at Cody in the eyes as he approaches me with fury flashing across his own. Hey, If I'm going to die at least I will die as a proud man. Mmm, yeah you're right.. let's not get carried away. 

He lifts up his fist and for a split second I close my eyes.. preparing for the worse. Suddenly.. I open my eyes, feeling nothing but a shriek adult voice coming through and screaming “Johnson!” Before the fist collides with my face, couch Simon grabs him by his arm pulling him away from me.

“I told you a lot of times! No violence allowed in this school!” He drags him towards the school, probably to the principal office as everyone finally disappears out of my sight, Well except for.. “Hey, you okay?” I try to offer him a hand but he slaps away my touch. He gets up on his own feet, even though he flinches the entire time due to the bruises on his body. “Don't.” He pants as he closes his eyes, resting with his back against the wall for support.. Yeah, not a good idea. “Crap!” He curses, well.. if it's qualified as a curse world. He pulls away trying to walk but it's really a difficul task for him at the moment, considering the way he's limping. My hand instantly grabs him by his arm and as soon as it makes contact with his skin, he turns his face looking at me with frightened eyes. Once he lifts up his eyes I suddenly feel a lump forming in my throat because, Considering the proximity of our faces, I can give a closer look to his features and his eyes are... wow. Breathtaking.  
“Y-You don't have to.” His voice is so fragile and low pitched.. it makes me snorts in sympathy as a strange warmth is spreading through my stomach making it feel like it's suddenly flooded with mosquitos.. I dunno, it feels like something is buzzing through my stomach. I still have to figure if in a pleasant or unpleasant way because honestly, I've never felt it before. I lift up his arm, wrapping it around my shoulder as my other hand is holding him by his hip.

“Come on, Let's get out of there.”

 


	3. Chapter 3.

We're walking towards the parking lot when I suddenly feel him tensing up.

"Okay.." He breathes out sharply as he pulls away, trying to keep himself steady on his own feet. He's definitely not succeeding.

His gaze trails over the exit, letting out a loud sigh before turning around, his eyes running over my features

I'm kind of feeling uneasy.. If I have to be completely honest. I feel his gaze piercing right through me, like he's somehow trying to read my thoughts.

I try to ignore the increasing pace of my heartbeats as he keeps staring at me, at some point I feel the need to ask him.

"Dude, why are you staring at me?"

He blinks, probably snapping back from whatever sort of imaginary world he was living in until few minutes ago. He blushes as he looks away for a brief moment.

"Nothing.. I've spaced out, I guess.."

"It's okay.. As long as you're not having a seizure or something.."

I can't hold back the laughter escaping my lips as he glares at me with his eyebrow perfectly arched and a resting bitch face that -I have to say-- suits him well. The little boy has some charm.

He sighs as he looks back towards the school's entry.

"I should get home.." 

"Is someone picking you up?" I'm asking him because he keeps looking towards the gate with concern flashing Across his eyes.

"I guess she forgot.." I hear him murmuring under his breath.

"Your mom forgot to pick you up from school?"

He jerks around realizing that I've heard his brief monologue, and from the look on his face he doesn't look pleased by it.

"I gotta go." He says with a glacial politeness in his voice that sends shivers down my spine, then before turning around again he clears his throat, adding. "And Thank you.. You know.."

I give a shrug of my shoulders.

"Everyone would have done that."

Well.. not everyone would have risked to get permanently injured but you know.. I'm humble.

He gives a nod and he turns around.

I watch him limping towards the school's gate and then as I'm heading outside too, my eyes fall on him and before realizing it, my body moves on its own accord. I'm running towards him, crouching across from him.

"Are you okay?!"

He's sitting on the ground, his hand covering his knee as his face is contorted with pain.

I'm not even sure if my touch is welcomed but it falls on his own.

"Leave me alone." He cries and I'm.. Conflicted, I guess, because I don't want to leave him alone and His hand is so warm.. Plus he's hurt.. Both phisically and emotionally. I'm a heartless bitch but I can't leave him alone. I won't.

"You're hurt." 

He gives a bitter laugh as he looks up. His watery eyes locking with mine.

"Why would you care if I'm hurt?! Do you think just because you scared him off once you're now self proclaiming yourself my guardian angel?"

What the fuck, dude? At least be grateful that I saved your locked up ass, today.

"Fuck you, dude." 

I know I shouldn't use this kind of language, but seriously.. Chill out, Connor Stevens.

I take back my hand and it feels cold, like my heart. Okay, I'm just being dramatic right now.

He flinches as he tries to get up. I'm standing right next to him, trying not to look because I know that If I look at him and he needs help I... Fuck.

He Inhales a sharp intake of breath as soon as my hand grips him by his arm, preventing him to fall once again on his butt onto the hard ground.

"Thanks.."

I don't give him a reply, we just keep walking together in complete silence until we're finally out of the school's area.

I let him go and he lays with his back against the wall, letting out a snort.

"Take a picture, it will last longer.."

Okay.. Jesus forgive me for my manners today but..

"What the fuck is your problem, man?"

He looks at me with wide eyes, a half smirk on his damn plump lips. Fuck.

"I don't have a problem. I just don't like being stared at.."

"Then wear a damn potato sack on your face, dude."

He laughs.

Damn his laughs is something that makes my stomach twitch. Damn butterflies, so they really exist.

"That was a good one." He comments with an amused laugh escaping his lips as he takes a hesitant step towards me.

"Shouldn't you go home?"

"Shouldn't you do the same?"

He smiles sadly as he says. "I'm about to walk home, what about you?"

At this point, my answer is very predictable..

"I'm walking you home."

His eyes grow huge.

"Why would you want to walk me home?"

Why are you this fucking difficult..

"Because I want to." I give a shrug of my shoulders as a idea crosses my mind. "-- and I'm up for froyo."

His eyebrows raise in interest as a soft smile creeps over his lips.

"Froyo?"

His voice sounds so full of wonder.. I can't believe he hasn't... God, this is awesome.

"You've never tried the best Froyo in town?"

I'm hoping he says no because if he hasn't, that really means that No one's ever showed Him how the World works.

He shakes his head and I find myself smiling like I've just won the jackpot.

"Remember this day.."

"Huh?" He says with amusement filling his voice. He seems confused, let me explain..

"Today I'll deflower your froyo verginity."

Okay, I should Have phrased it better because he seems at loss of words.

His face turns into cold stone and then I realize that I screwed my chances.. Literally.

 


	4. Chapter 4.

_"Fuck. I'm so..." Words get stuck in my throat as I try to come up with something nice to say to make up for the fact that I'm an asshole. I've basically fucked up every chance I had with the power of just one sentence. Wow, congrats Jude._

Now he's looking at me in a way that I can't really decipher.

His fists are clenching so yeah, there's a chance he's gonna kick my ass in this exact moment but there's also this sad light in his eyes that makes my stomach sink, just a little bit, okay _I lied, It makes me ache a lot._

"I'm sorry.. I shouldn't have..." Basic and sincere. There's no other way to make it up to the look of distress he has on his face right now.

Luckily he seems to appreciate my honesty because The tight line forming starts softening until there's a soft but still tense smile firm planted on his lips.

He doesn't say anything more than _"Shall we?"_ And I'm totally okay with that.

There's an awkward silence filling the air as we walk towards the Froyo place, it's heavy, almost disturbing.. 

"Can I ask you a question?" 

Thank God, And he also initiated the conversation.. It's a huge development, people.

 "Ask away." 

He seems hesitant, but then he exhales sharply. His voice comes out low and nervous.

"What do you know about me?"

  _Good question, Connor._

"I know nothing about you."  _Truth._

"But I want to know more about you." 

_Surprisingly.. Also truth._

"I'm sure you know everything there's need to be said about me."

He says with sarcasm filling his voice as his eyebrow lifted up in a skeptical arch. "You're one of the most popular kids in our school.." Then his voice starts to crack as he adds. "And I'm the favorite target of jocks. "

"All I know about you is that you're loyal andA bit conservative, It seems. You like playing soccer and--"

My voice gets cut off by the wave of laughter escaping his lips. I can my eyes grow huge and he must have noticed because he apologizes as soon as he sobers up.

" I'm so sorry." He says with amusement still filling his voice that makes me realize how good is to hear him laughing. It's soft and bright and It makes me realize that I like it. I like hearing his laugh and giggles, his snorts and every kind of sounds he makes.

"It's just that.. I've always heard them calling me  _'Virgin Stevens'_  but I've never been called conservative.  _I like it."_

That's a smile? Oh.. I made him smile! A real smile! 

We chat and surprisingly I get to know more about him and his life; What he likes to do in his free time and I found myself smiling like a loon as we sit down at the small circular table trying to ignore goosebumps forming on my skin, the moment our fingers brush slightly against each other whenever we reach for the cup of froyo on the very small confined space.

"Sorry.." 

He blushes slightly as he takes his cup but he doesn't seem bothered. Good.

We keep the conversation going, talking about stupid things like homework and silly tv shows.. That according to me aren't silly at all, infact he tries to hide his smirk behind the huge cup as he holds back the laugh when I start to mention my favourite tv show..

"No way! " He almost chokes on his froyo and I would be worried if he wasn't smiling like that.. Wow, just wow.

He sobers up as he takes a deep breath, collecting himself.

" Chuck."

"Yeah.."

"You liked 'Chuck'."

That's what I said, man.. He keeps laughing and I'd feel offended it it wasn't like listening to angels singing. Okay, that was...  _Forget I said anything._

"Hey.. It was cool."

"I'm sure it was.."

"It was! Hey, it was about a _lame_  nerd working in a _lame_  mall that becomes a member of the CIA. What's coolest than that? No, tell me, man. I'm waiting. "

"Jude." He says with slight affection filling his voice as he shakes his head in fake disappointment.. "Some things only ever happen in tv shows or movies.. Do you seriously believe that someone like Chad--"

_"Chuck."_

He smiles at the way my voice sounds a bit annoyed by the fact that he wasn't paying attention..

"-- _Chuck_. Yeah, sorry. As I was saying.. It's very unlikely that some nerd like him could achieve that success in life and in love. I mean.. His relationship with the blonde was--"

_Wait.._

"Have you watched it?"

He bits his lips as he nods.. A soft blush creeping over his cheeks that, It might sound pushy but makes me want to touch them,They look so soft.. like a cloud or cotton candy.

_Okay, what was that? I'm ashamed of my self.. like really._

"I did but I really couldn't get the point of it.. And that ending was--"

" I think what the writers wanted to say with that ending is that despite His fiancè lost her memory all it took was Chuck's kiss to.. _Ignite it all again,_ I guess. 

She knew, deep down, even before kissing him.. What they had and what they were.."

"Like I said.." He says with serious edge in his voice. "Things like that only happen in movies.."

"I don't think it's entirely true.. I think the message that that tv show wanted to send to his viewers is that everyone can make it in life, even the unfortunate ones.. Or at least, that's my interpretation of it.."

"I guess it makes sense.." His voice suddenly sounds so sad that makes me want to get up and pull him tightly against my chest.

He's murmuring under his breath with voice soft that makes me realize that he's thinking out loud in this moment.

"So there's really a chance for me to make it."

At those words I can't possibly refrain the urge to reach for his hand, so I just do that..

"You will."

He goes rigid for a second, my hand freezes above his own. I make a futile attempt of taking my hand away since, you know, I've met him just today and I've already made things impossibly awkward but then, surprisingly, he keeps it there on top of his.

"You don't know that, Jude.. You don't know me.."

_Why do I feel like that's not true?_

Then the words slipping out of my mouth shock the both of us.

"I want to."

He smiles softly as he takes his hand away .. The lack of warmth creates one unpleasant void into my chest that's not supposed to be there because this... this is a game. This is me playing with him, achieve my goal so that Taylor will finally stop black mailing me.

My thoughts are suddenly cut off by His voice, filled with genuine curiosity that almost breaks me.

"Why would you want to know me, Jude?"

 "You already asked that.." 

 "I asked you what do you know about me.. That's not the same."

"Well." I lean with my elbows on the small table as Our eyes meet. It's ashonishing how bright they are as he waits expectlantly for my answer. I feel like I can lose himself into those hazel diamonds.

Fuck, what's happening to me?! Pretend I haven't said anything, blame it on sigar high caused by this froyo because this isn't me, okay? I'm not this _sap_.

 

"I just feel like there's more in you than what you let people think.."

"Interesting assertion." He concedes as he lets out a soft snort before getting up from his seat, his voice suddenly cold and weird almost detached.

What happened?

"I just wish It was true. Look, it was really nice.. I.. had a nice time with you. Thank you but I really need to go, now.”

“Okay.” I tell him. “Bye Connor, see you at school.”

  
He smiles as he gives a quick nod of his head before literally running outside and makes me wonder if I've done something wrong because, What the fuck? Two seconds ago he was sitting there, just across from me all smiling and chill and absolutely perfect and now.. Now he's getting out of that door .

I need to know if I've screwed it up more than I already did.

"Keep the rest." I say in a rush to the waitress as I run after him, luckily his injured knee doesn't let him going that far.. And in three seconds I've caught up with him.

"Connor.." 

I gently pull him by the sleeve of his jacket and he released a wounded sound out of his throat. What the fuck is happening?

“Hey.”  
He's crying?

“What's wrong?! Are you okay? Does your knee hurt? ”

He shakes his head, wiping away his tears with the sleeve of his jacket.  
“No.. I'm so pathetic, really, man. Forget You've seen me cry.”  
  


“Why should I? I.. I don't want to forget. I want to help you if I can.”

  


“I'm... oh my God.” Connor's laughing now while he's still crying. Okay, I'm confused.

“I.. oh seriously this is...” He trails off with a loud sigh as he says. “You're probably gonna feel weirded out by what I'm about to say but since I'm assuming you'll go back to ignore me starting from tomorrow, but, okay.. yeah, I'll say it anyway.”  
My heart is pounding painfully inside of my chest. He's gonna say that he likes me, right? Right? This is over. My bet is over. Wow that was fast, but why I'm not feeling like jumping out of happiness? Why I want to bit my lip in order to refrain a holding breath? W-why I feel like the ground is about to crumble down beneath my feet?

“I know we're not friends or anything but this afternoon.. I've felt like I finally had one.”

Fuck. This boy is capable of fucking me up with one look, let alone these words, his face, his soft voice...

There's only one thing I can say to him since he's obviously waiting for me to kick his ass of tell him to fuck off considering how he's tensed up, shoulders rigid and breath shorts and heavy. Only one thing I know I won't regret later..

“We are.” I see his nostrils dilate as he sucks a huge breath in, his chest lifting up as it fills with air. It gives me a huge sense of pride that our newly friendship makes him so happy because it makes me happy too.

“ _We are friends, Connor.”_

He smiles so brightly that It makes me urge to put my sunglasses on since it's as blinding as the sun.

“Cool.” He tells me as he keeps smiling, clearly unable to put that smile off his face. It's not like I'm complaining. It's pretty nice, more than nice. “See you at school, Jude.”

He runs and then when I think I'm allowed to get a grip on myself he turns around and he fucking waves at me! So, in this moment as I'm literally chuffed to bitsI decide that whataver will happen, I'll make it less painful as possible because Connor Stevens is actually a cinnamon roll and I'm the fucking knife.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The references in this chapter are from the tv show "Chuck" that I loved with every fiber of my being and mourning for weeks when it ended LOL


	5. Chapter 5

It becomes even harder, after that, for me to justle between real life and my incognito life as Connor’s hunter.

The first important rule is to not let _(under any circumstances.)_ those smiles and waves of his hand, getting in my direction whenever he sees me in the hallways, to mess up with my head.

Should be easy, isn’t it? It’s a simple task, after all. Except that is not.

I’ve always been a pro in faking interest in things while my head was clearly somewhere else, except that with Connor happens the complete opposite. I should keep focusing on trying to get to know him and achieve my assignement but when I’m with him, having lunch in the library filled by the quiet silence of the surroundings or when he invites me to hang out under the bleaches after a soccer game.. _I can’t help but let those lips distract me._

I constantly feel my eyes flicker from his eyes to his mouth, staring at it and wondering how tasteful it would feel pressed against my own.

_I think he notices._

It’s impossible for someone to not notice the way I'm thirsting over his lips also cause when I realize that maybe, and I care to stress that out.. _maybe_ , I’ve been staring at those lips for quite an amount of time, enough to arouse suspicion, I look up into his eyes and _it’s too late._

He’s finished rambling about homework? Chores? His mom’s dhiarrea? What the fuck was he talking about? And I see him smirk before dragging his lip between his teeth; softly, almost subtle but full clearl with intentions. _Cruel intentions._

“You haven’t heard a word, have you?”

I shake my head. There’s no point in denying, also because Connor would ask me some trick questions, later. He’s done that before. He gives this low chuckle out of his throat, which sounds so endearing to my ears.

It’s lame to deny that I’m not attracted to this boy. He might be the prettiest boy I’ve ever laid my eyes on and the fullest, most inviting, bee-stung lips I’ve ever dreamed of asting.

I almost say it. _Can I kiss you, Connor?_ But that will blow everything up. I know it.  
Connor is smart. Incredibly so. He doesn’t let people in so easily but with me.. he looks like he has no one else to rely on but me.

“I hate that my mother makes me go to church on Sunday morning..”

He usually rants about his mom’s obtuse, narrow-minded ideals. From what Connor has told me, She wants him to be the most closeted preppy student in San Diego.

I’m not in the right place to judge since my parents would not buy me rainbow colored sheets and welcome me home with ‘Proudest LGBTQ Parents.” shirts.

They are almost as narrow-minded as Connor’s mom, if not worse.

My sister Callie came out when she was seventeen years old. I’ve always considered her the bravest person I know but when she was disgraced and forced to hide for not being the kind of daughter my parents could brag about with friends and relatives.

  
_Callie told them to fuck off a year after that._

  
She was the most brilliant student of her class and the _genius_ got into Yale. Once she left for college, she never came back. They never brought her up again. Never talked to her again. I do, sometimes. We’d skype behind their backs. She’s doing better than I thought. She has this smile of _freedom_ on her face whose I’m jealous of very, very much.

I’m not supposed to be free the way I am, the way we are. My parents made that very clear in the middle of my sister’s coming out. _“Queers are not part of this family.”_  
That’s why I’ve never entertained the idea to ever share details of my private life with them asides from the basic information a son is supposed to share with their parents. _“Yes. Everything okay at school._ ” _“I'm going out._ ” “ _Good morning_.” _“Good night.”_ “ _Could you pass me the salt, please?”_

  
  


I like boys.. and girls. My hooks up have been strictly occasional like that one time thing with Jamie and few randez-vous with a cheerleader during 'seven minutes in heaven.' at some lame party. I've never been steady, then Taylor came along and somehow she dragged me into her universe made of darkness and thrilling deceive. I _liked her_. She’s probably the only girl that managed to send a thrill through my whole body, made me feel wanted, cared of in her very own messed up way.

I hear my phone buzzing in my pocket. I don’t need to look at the ID caller to know that is Taylor calling me.

I should probably answer the phone but honestly, It’s like a magic spell fell on me, a forceful, irresistible force that keeps me from looking away from his eyes.

I feel I need a distraction. I pull out my lighter and asks him if he wants to join me.

His lips part in surprise, maybe surprised by the fact that I occasionally smoke pot. He looks like he wants to say yes, then something shifts across his eyes and he ends up shaking his head, a soft not very convincing _‘no thanks.’_ Falling off his lips.

“Okay,” I tell him, as I finally find something that will keep me distracted from those hazel diamonds.

I feel his subtle stare, looking at me intently by the corner of his eyes.

“ _Penny for your thoughts?”_

He clears his throat, a slight blush flushing his cheeks for being caught in the act. I see the moment when his eyes flicker downward for the briefest moment and I find myself following the trajectory of his eyes and.. _oh._

I should have probably listened to the voice in my head screaming at me, “ _don’t look.”_ _“Don’t look.” “Don’t look.”_

I look away just in time before being caught staring at his crotch.

He raises his eyes and his gaze is lost somewhere on my face. He could be staring at my eyes or my lips, as far as I’m concerned. I’ll never know.

The phone starts vibrating again in my pocket and this time I decide to use it as a gateway from _this_ moment because, otherwise, my gaze will always be tantalized to stare down there and I just..

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He gives me this strange, needy look as he gets up from the dusty ground as well. “Are you going home?”

“Yeah.” I lie. Taylor will probably want to talk to me in the janitor closet near the gym. I know the drill.

The needy look is back and Jesus, It makes me want to grab him by the back of his neck and crash my lips against his own, finding finally the answer to the question that keeps driving me to insanity since the first time I met him, two weeks ago.

_What do his lips taste like?_

Even worse than the pout is the hopeful smile filling Connor’s eyes and lips.

_It’s unreal._

“I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

_He says it like it’s the best promise someone could ever make to him._

  
“What the fuck took you so long?”

I open my mouth to answer 'that I was busy conquering her lamb' but then her lips falling against mine, cuts off whatever I was about to say.

She pushes me against the nearest wall and gives this little laugh against my mouth when I hear myself hissing in discomfort.

“ _Such a delicate flower.”_ She muses as she shakes her head. She drags her finger along my collarbone, asking me how the mission is going.

“Good,” I tell her and then she raises her eyebrow as to give her more, fulfilling answers and I add. “I think he’s starting to fall for me.”

She smiles, delighted by my short yet juicy debrief as he kneels down across from me.

“My boy is working hard. you need a reward..”

  
It takes a lot of Taylor’s best efforts to make me come.

She starts enthusiastically but the longer time I spend without letting a sound, standing there almost bored, the more she’s intentioned to go through this.

I’m almost tempted to tell her to stop cause, no matter how hard she hollows her cheeks or how deep she takes me..

“ _What the fuck is happening to your dick?”_

She whines with flushed cheeks and jaw clenched in pain.

I close my eyes, determined to get over with this and I find myself, _unconsciously,_ thinking of the briefest electric shocks flooding through me at the sight of Connor’s crotch.

I feel pleasure crawling up my spine, a sight of hazel eyes looking up at me and his plump lips doing obscene things to every inch of me.

She smiles victoriously as I shoot down her throat, she stands up on shaky legs leaving me (as usual.) on my own device for what concern cleaning the mess.

“Took you long enough.”

She’s so proud of herself, smiling at herself for making me come, or at least.. _this is what she thinks._

 


End file.
